i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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