I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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