So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
