My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
