I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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