somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
