The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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