I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
