Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize