I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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