she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Dick very happy bro
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
