I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Randomize
