My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
