Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
