so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
