But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
