Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
foreskin is a definite game changer
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
