This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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