this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
