I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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