I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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