he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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