ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
