Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
