watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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