Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Randomize
