He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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