i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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