im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
