would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
