no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
