gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you win again, gameday.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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