You really coming over, don't trick.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
