:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
