I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
