we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
