How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
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it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
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Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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