the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Randomize