you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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