Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I got inside last night via doggy door
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
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