why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize