Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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