My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
