So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You left your phone here
Wait...
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
