we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
