hotel room ftw
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
