I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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