I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?