Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?

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  (312): How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick? http://tfl.nu/oq47
  Replies (6) Good night (497) Bad night (1539) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon

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  (310): im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon http://tfl.nu/qfy4
  Replies (21) Good night (498) Bad night (1397) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.

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  (716): it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis. http://tfl.nu/lwww
  Replies (57) Good night (5944) Bad night (884) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.

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  (330): I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes. http://tfl.nu/ahu2
  Replies (32) Good night (4415) Bad night (1006) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.

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  (570): You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians. http://tfl.nu/d2bn
  Replies (20) Good night (5793) Bad night (1132) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.

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  (402): On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms. http://tfl.nu/59ye
  Replies (35) Good night (8288) Bad night (1068) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.

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  (913): It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide. http://tfl.nu/jrdr
  Replies (7) Good night (3641) Bad night (829) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.

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  (440): If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times. http://tfl.nu/5360
  Replies (2) Good night (3352) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  Just drove past the dude that came in your sock

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  (315): Just drove past the dude that came in your sock http://tfl.nu/cm59
  Replies (3) Good night (637) Bad night (1429) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.

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  (248): Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents. http://tfl.nu/4qnq
  Replies (6) Good night (2387) Bad night (529) Order T-Shirt
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience

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  (620): We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience http://tfl.nu/dzei
  Replies (8) Good night (1698) Bad night (427) Order T-Shirt
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.

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  (504): U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life. http://tfl.nu/tysm
  Replies (2) Good night (563) Bad night (1133) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?

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  (919): Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight? http://tfl.nu/lpr7
  Replies (5) Good night (1046) Bad night (333) Order T-Shirt
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.

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  (269): My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers. http://tfl.nu/z1x9
  Replies (6) Good night (813) Bad night (291) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.

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  (651): I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game. http://tfl.nu/npvh
  Replies (2) Good night (1069) Bad night (244) Order T-Shirt

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