so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
