Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
