My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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