Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I have fence marks all over my body
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
