Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize
